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Today the high sales of popular consumer goods reflect the power of advertising and not the real needs of the society in which they are sold. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

It is well-known that（句型需要進一步升級）whether the enormous sales of popular consumers goods reflect the power of advertisements or the real need of the society （不建議直接照搬需要改寫）has been a （活用副詞fiercely）heated debate recently. Some people firmly believe that the influence of advertisement is the determing factor,while many others advocate that people decide what they want to purchase themselves. As far as I am concerned, I side with the latter opinion. The reasons are presented as follows.
（邏輯連接詞first of all 需要跟進）It is increasingly acknowledged that people can but （基礎(chǔ)詞匯還需要進一步升級purchase）products they want （建議活用復合句型whatever they want）more conveniently and effectively with the help of advertisements. Nowadays citizens can choose products(什么樣的products？,？比如all kinds of products ),such as phones,laptops, at home by watching a variety of advertisement. (邏輯連接詞what is more  ,，additionally )They can compare dozens of the products and choose the best and cheapest ones. （今昔對比需要帶入對比的邏輯連接詞however，in contrast）In the past, people used to have to drive to malls or all kinds of stores in order to choose what they want.Advertisements help people choose what they want and need easily, thus increasing (不及物dramatically raising)the sales of consumers goods.
Another reason why I advocate this opinion is that advertisements and other medias provide a lot of(建議高級點詞匯a large amount of ) useful information and useful channels to get what we want（此句話讓人家以為同學觀點是站在ads的好處呢,，中心句一定是我方觀點鮮明帶出來）. To begin with, when people want purchase certain products, and there are advertising about it, and it could help us know more about what the product can do and what should we looking for when we are buying them. In the end, it is our own demand decides whether we buy them or not.Therefore, our choice of goods does not depend on the influence from advertisements,(同學注意考試的時候需要把最核心論點放到這段最開始,，the real needs and demands from the consumers are the key reasons for high sales of popular consumer goods 作為中心句子，然后邏輯連接詞來to start with, what is more ,來分別解釋中心句含義,；)
（邏輯連接詞on the other hand 等）Some people claim that the influence of advertising on people is the reason why the sales of consumer goods is so high. However, as far as I am concerned, such assertion does not hold any water. The effect of advertising on people is huge,but it is not the determing factor. It is people’s real need for the products that decides what they purchase and advertisements only help them do it with more efficiency.
From what we have discussed above, we can safely draw to the conclusion that it is people’s need that promote the high sales of popular consumer goods（結(jié)尾總結(jié)主體三段的核心句）
目前同學基本功還是可以的,，有一定的拓展能力，但是整體邏輯框架需要進一步強化,，每一段目前中心觀點不鮮明,，邏輯連接詞也不是很熟練應用到行文中；同學詞匯語法還是可以的,，但是需要進一步升級,，就會更好了
本文由沈陽雅思培訓通途國際英語的Andy老師為同學們總結(jié)的雅思寫作真題，希望對托福備考的小伙伴有所幫助,，更多精彩內(nèi)容請訪問通途國際英語雅思頻道,。

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